I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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