I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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