Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
