I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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