Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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