I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
