The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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