Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
