Porn is love you can see.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
