He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
