Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
