I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
