This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
