...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
