TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Randomize