i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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