But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
