I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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