she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Randomize