my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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