if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize