and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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