he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
