its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
