you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Randomize