Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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