He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
