Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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