i just wanna soil my oats bro
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
sex in a hospital.. check
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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