dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize