Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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