Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize