You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
