In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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