i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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