i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
