Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
