Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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