You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
