that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize
