The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize