Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize