We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
