we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Drake has all the answers
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
