The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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