Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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