yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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