pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
