Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
