Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
