on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize